Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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