she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
