I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
