Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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