ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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