yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize