My brain says no but my pants say off.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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