so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize