WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize