it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
