If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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