Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
how can u be prego again
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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