I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
