think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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