i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize