pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
We have so much sex to catch up on
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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