So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I take back everything I said about communal showers
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
We are all done wearing pants today
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
