Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
do herpes really smell.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
33 Memes You’ll Find Uncomfortably Relatable If You’ve Ever Been Through A Messy Breakup
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
19 Utterly Perfect Responses To ‘Send Nudes’ Texts
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.