My room smells like vodka and shame
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.