Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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