I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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