He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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