i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
