party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
