Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
