I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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