I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
