I wish I could punch you in the face.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i will never coherently bang her
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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