Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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