four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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