Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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