I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
