Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
