So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
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He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
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I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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