Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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