She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
