Apparently you make a good broom.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
