the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
