haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize
