I just made out with a guy for $7.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
