Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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