my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Alive.
So much puke
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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