If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
