i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
