Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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