Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
