but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
