she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
