Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
