The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
only you would photoshop your dick
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
