I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
