You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
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Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
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Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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