Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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